to the oak

back to the spot james took me when we first started dating. we slept in a tent on lake ontario and drove to the river early in the morning while the fog was still burning off and james warmed my hands up with his.

we came back again with our two month old finnegan after our wedding. finn and i watched james pulling up to the dock in the cold and waving to us to come down to see the fish he caught. we laid the fish on the dock and put finn next to them- they were bigger than our baby.

this time we came back just the two of us. excited and a little nervous to leave our son. "it's finn's vacation, too" my dad kept saying. we went on the new boat. we cooked dinner late and drank a lot of beer. we slept in and sat on the porch rocking chairs looking down to the water. we spent most of the time fishing. james catching three or four and i got one. the biggest one i've ever caught. we couldn't stop laughing by the time i reeled her in and then tried holding her.

after my fish i made james get off the boat and we drove to the nearest dive bar by the lake for celebratory whiskey shots and some hoppy IPAs. we laughed at how bad i am at drinking now. feeling tipsy just from two beers. we got back on the water before sunset and trolled down the river closer to our cabin. the sky was getting dark and we were the only ones on the water. i'm thankful for my husbands love of the water, and fishing, and for planning a couple nights for the two of us, in one of his most favorite places. and for reassuring me our boy was perfectly fine when i started getting bits of panic throughout the trip. "relax jane" he'd say smiling. thank you james.

when we got home sunday afternoon finn ran into my arms and wouldn't let go. he was laughing the sweetest little giggle into my neck and when i said i missed you, he replied "i missed you too, mama".

"look grammy! my mama came back" he yelled.

james didn't stop rubbing his little head.

And a happy boy we're home